A sad update

 

This photo was taken of my mother this past Thanksgiving at my cousin’s home in Brooklyn.

Today we had the dreaded family meeting at the rehab where my mother is recuperating from her stroke.

 

While my mother has made many strides since her stroke on March 1, they don’t anticipate that she will ever be able to live without 24 hour care.  I had come to the same conclusion, but hearing it from the professionals has made me profoundly sad.

Wen I was four, my  mother’s father died.  Right after the shiva, my grandmother moved in with us. She and I shared a room.  About  nine months later, my grandmother had a severe stroke. My parents were my grandmother’s primary caregivers.

This is a road my mother knows well as a caregiver. Now, she is the one being cared for.

 

When my sisters and I  recall those years we remember how completely stressed both of our parents were.  My sisters and I are quite a bit older than our parents were during those difficult years.  All of our kids are also older and less needy than we were during those years.

I am grateful for friends and family members who have been so kind to all of us during this time. The people who listen, who ask how I am, and really want to know, the people who have understood why I need to husband my energies and can’t open my Passover table quite as wide this year…many thanks to you all. I am touched by my dear friend who sent me a book she knew I would want ( it was on my secret lust list) and it arrived today when I was just feeling so sad.